Heart Change

 As Christians, we know that all things were created for God’s glory, including us. Yet it’s another truth that we often overlook. Sometimes it seems like we almost get into the mindset that the World was just accidentally created, and we just wound up here. We forget that from the day that the World was created, it was for the glory of God. From the moment God put man on this Earth, we were created for the glory of God, and most exceptionally when Jesus Christ died on the cross for sinners who deserve nothing less than the full wrath of God, yet were given life, it was for the glory of God.

“It is my life’s thesis that outside of Jesus Christ there is existence, but there is no such thing as life” Matt Chandler.

Before I came to Christ, I spent a lot of time doing things to earn God’s love. I loved and boasted my own accomplishments and abilities because I thought that that was the only way God would love me. I believed in God, but never felt like He believed in me. I spent my time wondering why though I tried to please God, I was never satisfied. I thought that He gave joy to people and wondered why I wasn’t happy. Finally I became so run down that I just felt like giving up. I was miserable and alone. I became a Christian when I said to God, “I give up, and I can’t do this on my own.”  That is where God stepped in and gave me a new life, and I realized that He doesn’t give joy to people, He is joy. 

You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore. Psalm 16:11

After that revelation, I had what can only be described as a change in heart. Instead of doing things because they were the right thing to do, I began doing things for the glory of God because it was the only thing I could do.  I began to act out of love instead of obligation. He had given me a new life and in this life Christ lives in me and I in Him, and it became my disposition to love and serve him who has given us everything. Suddenly I was not doing things to earn God’s love I was doing them because I love God. I don’t pray because I am supposed to, I pray because I yearn to be in the presence of God and to have a deeper relationship with Him. I talk about the power of the Gospel to the people I love, knowing many of them will be offended and that it will possibly create distance in our friendship, but I do it because I love them and want them to know the joy that I know.

Knowing the love that God has for His people has made all the difference. It brings joy on the darkest of days, and makes the suffering of this life bearable as I gaze into the future of what is to come knowing nothing on this earth can separate me from the love of God. I can stumble and falter and utterly fail, and there will be nothing that I do that God cannot say, “I paid for that.”

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8: 37-39

Lord of All

When I was a child I thought I knew who God was and the answer to “What is God?” My answer would have probably been “God loves his Children.” This is partially true. When I began my walk with the Lord, I was sure I knew God and the answer to “What is God?” My answer was, “God loves His people and is always faithful to them.” This is also partially true, but God is many other things too.

When I became a Christian, one of my mentors gave me a list of God’s attributes which helped me realize how limited my view of God actually was. Along with being loving and faithful, God is omnipotent (all powerful), Omnipresent (present everywhere), Omniscient (all knowing), righteous, unchangeable, and perfect, and that is only naming a few. When she gave me this list, she pointed out each attribute and excitedly told my why they were so important and kept on explaining the difference between religion and relationship with God. At the time, I was overwhelmed and just trying to get my head around who God really was and how he could be all of these different things at the same time.

I think that we have a tendency as Christians of choosing the attribute of God that he will bless us with, tricking ourselves into believing that we know better than He does. Often, our prayers come out as orders more than requests, and even more often than that we expect those prayers to be answered in the way that WE see fit. This is an indication that we might not know God as well as we think we do.

Last year, my husband Brendan was gone at a training school for what was supposed to be 2 months, but it kept getting extended and extended. I could only communicate with him via letters and was alone and frustrated.  At the time, I was a very new Christian and continuously told myself that God was faithful and that Brendan would come home soon, but the time kept getting pushed back and I became confused. Luckily, God had a way to show me what I was missing.

Though the fig tree does not bud
    and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
    and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
    and no cattle in the stalls,
 yet I will rejoice in the Lord,
    I will be joyful in God my Savior.

The Sovereign Lord is my strength;
    he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
    he enables me to tread on the heights.

For the director of music. On my stringed instruments. Habakkuk 3: 7-19

When Brendan was gone, our church was doing a sermon series through Habakkuk. In the book of Habakkuk, the prophet is crying out to the Lord in frustration asking why evil was prevailing, and why God was doing nothing about it. Throughout the book this prophet is conversing with God who is responding to him and explaining to him what He is doing and will do to be faithful to his people. God showed me as I read through this book that Gods timeline is not our timeline, and God’s answers are not our answers but His answers are always better. He will work things out for His people in the way He knows is best.  He showed me that it is ok to come to Him in prayer and ask him to show us why He is doing what He is doing with respect and reverence. Sometimes it is not evident to us what is going on, especially if we are thrown into suffering for a period of time. The passage from Habakkuk 3 helps to remind me that no matter what our current situations are, God knows and has a way to sort it out; all we have to do is pray for Him to reveal his plans to us.

We will never completely understand God’s ways, but by praying during that time for God to speak to me and use His word to help me better understand Him, my faith in Him and knowledge of Him grew. When we seek to know and understand God and all of his attributes, we find peace and the world makes sense. When we try to separate God into different Gods then we begin to miss the point.  As I continue my walk with the Lord, I see my tendency to put myself at the center of the universe even as I know that I am not. I notice it in the way I read the Bible, looking for the passages that speak to me as if the Bible was written as “Kelly’s Book on How to Live,” when in truth the Bible is a gift from God so that we might know him; Just as Jesus came to so that we might know God. (1 John 5:20)